Mixed feelings about the good ol' days
Despite having visited the Witches Mil in the Isle of Mann back in 1968, it was a slow trip to becoming Pagan. I had been atheist with a small a, non aggressive, and later five years of being evangelical Buddhism, Nichiren Shosu, I then wet back to no religion until about 1980 when I occasional built stone altars to Pan and created my chant. But even then I was not routinely religious as I roamed the deserts mining thundereggs with my partner, who was not religious.
Of course this was the 80s and the Satanic Child Abuse scandals were in full swing. Pagans as a whole were in the closet and finding others took time. As bars were my only socializing and then only when I have the money to spend that was where I made my tentative attempt to find some. I did run into one, though later I wondered why he called himself one. However it was my first entrée into the Pagan community. Pagan gatherings were very private in New Mexico at that time and you literal had to know a Pagan to find out out a gathering and even then they had to decide if you were trustworthy.But through this new fried I got invited to a gathering up in the mountains. I was given instructs of what road to follow and what color ribbons to look for the guide the way as no one would actually put up signs to a gathering.We were warned not to talk about the events in any of the nearby towns or villages
Wiccans made up most of the people, events were clothing optional, one could use whatever recreational drug of choice, just as long as you did cause any trouble. Alcohol was still the favorite though grass was a close second and magic mushrooms, perhaps some acid.We had some children an no one of the seemed to notice anything disturbing. Sexual encounters were possible but usual out away in the forest. Fr t most part the only excitement was weather did not always cooperate and we ended one maypole dance when a hail storm showed up. We did have one case of the wrong person being invited, a biker of heavily into both drugs and alcohol and as it happened a deep fear of Witches. We did find a magical solution to calm him down before the police came to pick it up and no one got hurt.
Fast forward to modern times. We have Pagan Pride events, advertise openly Pagan gatherings many of them far larger than the one I went to of only 100 to 200 people.I have never been to the modern ones, can't travel much and don't drive anymore, but i am not sure that I would enjoy the new Pagan Gathering because anyone can wander through. As a result we have a lot more rules to deal with. No optional nudity especially if any children are about, no recreational drugs, careful even about the alcohol. We try so hard not to have anything that might upset the non Pagans likely to wander on through. I now of one High Priestess in new York who has services in a park in New York City that bragged about how much similar to a church service here ceremonies were, so as not t upset anyone one else using the park. We now have Wiccan Pagan Churches officially approved by the IRS and are talking about becoming main stream.
Now am I the only one who wonders if we still actually have any Pagans left? Sure it is nice not to worry about attack as much, but is what we still have actually Pagan or becoming almost wannabe Christian. If we wanted to be mainstream couldn't we have just stayed in the religions we were in. Now perhaps the earlier gatherings were just a result of us being younger back them, perhaps getting older we would have become somewhat more conservatives as we began to deal with much of the similar situations n life. But I still have to wonder if we lost more than we gained in the process.
As I said at the beginning I have mixed feelings both about the old days and about today. Or is that just a sign of becoming a geezer seeing seventy on the near horizon?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Arimesis on -
As with anything that becomes mainstream, it dumbs down to the least among us lest it be politically incorrect. They teach what they do not know, they practice a farce in an attempt to impress those who have less than the minimal knowledge that they themselves possess.
There are still initiation bound traditions that have power and do not try to give it away or impress the dolts with it. These are not Pagan Pride showmen or eclectic buffoons. These are a year and a day to learn he least of the secrets, and are oath bound to keep the secrets that they learn.
The mainstream problem is that any little piss ant of a recluse teenager with a Silver Ravenwolf book is viewed as an expert by her peers, and that pollutes the craft. Let the fools believe that Grimasse and Penczak actually know what they are talking about. Let the prolific authors who create the answers that they do not know fill the minds of idiots who are willing to read and believe.
Soon, the truth will be so obscured and the discord surrounding the arts will be so prevalent that true witches will again be hidden children...as it should be.
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Permalink Reply by Christopher Blackwell on
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Arimesis
I know in Wicca there is this mistaken idea that it is supposed to become a mass religion. But that goes against what my high priestess taught me. She put it this way, if ten people are curious, one may read a book on it. Of ten that read, one may start to practice it, of ten that practice one may last. Of ten that last one may actually become someone with skill and talent. I think that I did the math and that worked out to about one in the ten thousand of these that were curious.
So far I have lasted, but I have no way to judge how good I am, or not, as I am a solitary and have not worked with enough others to have a clue about where I am. My training was as first level initiated priest, so I am not going to be running around claiming to be a high priest. I network information, help others tell their story and keep in contact with a variety of different communities. That seems to keep me busy enough. Ego can be dangerous in magic if it gets out of control. Bt that is true in the mundane world. When people believe themselves to be special, that the rules that affect others do not affect them. that is when they may do stupid or even horrible things.
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Permalink Reply by Arimesis on
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I have met some grand ladies in their seventies, one in her late eighties, who still practice. Their craft is based on oath-bound teaching and those down their lineage also teach exactly the same. No bling, no bells and whistles, no embellishment. They are sure in their knowledge and practice.
Even Crowley and Regardie twisted what they wrote so that non-initiates could not understand. All that is written and published is for the sheep. It is for the most part useless. Unless copied in write of hand under oath, it is pretty much useless. If what was copied by write of hand is subsequently published, then the one doing the publishing is an oath-breaker and cannot be trusted, so that publication is also suspect.
I do suggest, if you question your skill, keep a diary such as Crowley did. Proof is in the seeing, repeating and recording.
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Permalink Reply by MJ on -
Blessings Christopher,
Your statement, ' that you have mixed feelings, and wonder if this is a sign of age....' caught me...
Comparisons of what was and what is, really has nothing to do with your skills. Rather, I would say that because you question, your skills of understanding and growing in your path, continue on. The continuum of learning, should be never ending. From what you have written, your learning is a daily part of your life. With each turn of the Earth, cycle of the seasons, or dawn of a new day, learning happens....Be Blessed
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Permalink Reply by Christopher Blackwell on
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MJ,
I do believe that everything that happens contains a lesson to be learned, regardless of if the happening is considered bad or good.
I have worked in nursing home for nine months. The problems did not surprise me that patents had, what surprised me were those that managed to still have a life in a nurshing home. They were usually cheerful and independent people. What I learned from them helped me survive hospital and nursing home living myself and get back out. My own experience helps me know what do do for my partner whom is now in a nursing home. I remember well how cut off one feels in any institution. So I call him every night, visit him once week, as I need a driver to get me there and have made it to both of his trips to the emergency room. I keep him informed of what is happening at our shop.
So yes life teaches many lessons, if we are fortunate to see the lesson that come with the event. The rough times still let me search out the good in every day, to search out the beauty even in the most unlikely of places and to find reasons to laugh each day many times. My computer allows me to have contact with so many people in our various communities in different parts of the world. So living in somewhat an isolated place in the desert does not prevent me from learning about things else where.
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Permalink Reply by Christopher Blackwell on
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As I am not trained to high priest I do not train, though I might suggest books that I have read that were helpful in my own beginning while I searched for a teacher. Then it is up to them to keep on their search. the fact that I was taken on trained and initiated still surprises me. Being an itinerant miner of geodes is not the perfect situation for getting training. In fact it was a flea market from hell that kept me in one place long enough to fid a teacher and get daily training.
As an old man I run a shop selling local geodes, one of the few shops to sell stuff from our own mines, though the mining is now done by friends. Meanwhile I was told by the BLM that our mines, small as they are are just about the only mines in my my state that obey ll the rules, including reshaping that ground to natural contours and reseeding with local grasses. With our long drought it has taken often several seedings to get anything to grow. The mining days are just abut at the end, but even the larger mine managed to stay within the boundaries of the original mine, so that we did not have to open any new ground. The collection created by my partner from over sixty years of mining, mostly by hand, was given to our town museum so that the public will get to see the great variety. We gave it free and clear, to protect it from disappearing which is what happens to most collections. I still go dow to take care of it as best I can. I was vacuuming three of the cases a month ago and changing lights in the cases today. That collection was the most valuable thing we had and it is rather nice to know it will be enjoyed long after we are gone. Nice to have been part of the process of creating it, as a helper, but all the knowledge was my partner. Meanwhile I keep his research available, copies of the book for sale and he has given many copies away and as have some of the geologists and volcanologists that help get scientific information. So of the tests my partner had done at our state mining college brought out new facts that had not been known before. How strange for a man who never finished high school to leave new information for science.
Now this may have little to do with witchcraft, but it embodies what I have learned since becoming a witch. If the craft does not influence every aspect of one's mundane life then it is little more than a game and role playing. Living life can be some of the greatest magic that we do, enjoying life regardless of what comes, or does not come our way, is magic.
I have a strange habit, when I meet a person at various stages of life, I describe some of what they are going through, I have been careful to remember each stage of my life for lessons learned. I point the obvious down side of each stage, but then go to point out the not so obvious benefits, including unpopular periods like midlife crisis and getting old. I usually have my customers laughing before I'm done.
One of my regular roles is as an encourager. After all we have far too many discouragers in our world. I do my best not to play the old man games that were played on me when I was young, so I usually have young people relaxed around me. Young men for instance are surprised to be treated as men without being put down or hurt. But then I also remember what it was like to be their age. As I tell them young people are too dumb to know what is impossible. As a result, sometimes they go out and make the impossible for the rest of us. Last thing I would want to do is to break their spirit and keep them from doing it.
Perhaps that makes me a philosopher witch.
Arimesis said:I have met some grand ladies in their seventies, one in her late eighties, who still practice. Their craft is based on oath-bound teaching and those down their lineage also teach exactly the same. No bling, no bells and whistles, no embellishment. They are sure in their knowledge and practice.
Even Crowley and Regardie twisted what they wrote so that non-initiates could not understand. All that is written and published is for the sheep. It is for the most part useless. Unless copied in write of hand under oath, it is pretty much useless. If what was copied by write of hand is subsequently published, then the one doing the publishing is an oath-breaker and cannot be trusted, so that publication is also suspect.
I do suggest, if you question your skill, keep a diary such as Crowley did. Proof is in the seeing, repeating and recording.
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Permalink Reply by MJ on
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Christopher,
I have a feeling that you in many ways have surpassed your teacher in many ways... You may not have earned a specific title, yet, I highly doubt the wisdom you've shared could be duplicated by many... There are so many sayings, quotes if you will, that as I have read this thread, instantly have jumping to mind. Your spirit leaps from your words, and with it, come the depth of what is within you...
Truly, I feel you have not only been blessed with the understanding and lessons you have gained on your journey, but you have blessed the lives of those you have interacted with...Mixed feelings, is how you referred to the past and present, sitting on the other side of a computer screen, reading your words, let me say, that you have managed to bring life to both...That is a a rare gift!!!
Growing up in a home, that held one of life's greatest treasures, My Great-Grandmother,I was blessed. My siblings and I, had a life that very few will ever have the opportunity to have. When her children and husband passed, she came to live with my mother and father. My parents couldn't have brought a greater gift to our lives. The day I gave birth to her great-great grandson, she proudly held him, and then spent the next seven years teaching him to build card houses, create puppet shows, and play chess like a pro. One thing she taught, was a level of understanding, that age was not a boundary to what one could or could not accomplish. Five generations later, and she still managed to bring out the best in ever single person she interacted with. I cried over my first lost love with her, her answer, to sit in the rocking chair and rock with me, as she told me how foolish boys were. We lost her in 1993, and she missed seeing the birth of her great-great granddaughter by a mere three weeks. She left a legacy that no one will ever be able to match.... I have a feeling, that there are those that now say you are a rare gift in their lives already.....Blessed Be... MJ )O(
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Permalink Reply by Christopher Blackwell on
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One of the things I did not have was an elder in my family I saw one grandfather once and the other twice and one grand mother three times. I can trace both my father's father's family twelve generations and my mothers's father's family twelve generations also. Sounds impressive until you realize that I have perhaps a dozen stories about my family so most of that is just names and dates and pictures of old family homes.
So ironically I sort of try to be the elder that I wish I had had when I was growing up. My view of an elder is he is always available but never intrusive. He is out of the politics of day to day life, he advises when asked, admits when he does not know and more importantly acts as an encourager, especially those are younger than he is. Now there are times when I slip.
I also have two part time employees a father and a son, who now remind me of things that I tend to forget. They do most of the physical work now. The father was nineteen when he started working full time, now works part time when he can.
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